Proverbs

So, I came up with this idea to sock writer's block right in the jaw, and I thought I'd share it with you.

• Step 1
• Figure out the location of your story. The country or land where that country currently resides or the country that most closely resembles the culture in your story will do.
• Step 2
• Look up proverbs from that country. World Proverbs is a great place to begin your search. Bonus: that site is just fascinating to leaf through.
• Step 3 
• Choose a proverb that sounds like something one of your characters would say. Or maybe choose a character that would normally never say something like your proverb and have them deliver that line. Zing!
• Step 4
• Write a scene that involves that proverb. When would your character say something like that proverb and to whom would they say it? Has something profound or silly or devastating or frightening or happy just occurred? What was that thing? Does that thing exist in your story already? Write about that event, too.
• Step 5
• Enjoy! You've just kicked the crap out of your writer's block. You now have a scene and maybe a new character or event! As Charlie Sheen would say, "duh, WINNING!"

May the 4th be with you!

Book Review of Plot and Structure

I have recently completed the book Plot and Structure by James Scott Bell, and I would like to share my thoughts on it with you. The book is part of a series titled Write Great Fiction.
When I decided to purchase some how-to books on novel-writing, I briefly perused my local Books-A-Million for a few books that grabbed my attention. This book is orange. When I hoisted a stack of books over to a chair and began leafing through them with, I admit, a little skepticism, this book immediately held my interest.
Mostly because it was orange. But also because Bell's tone was so witty and colloquial. It was as if he was sitting next to me, giving me some much needed advice on plot (and structure) as I started out on my adventure to write my novel.
I was actually unaware of how much of his advice I would end up needing, but I bought his book along with a few others, took them home, and began reading. Turns out I really needed his advice. He outlines tons of tricks to outfox my writer's block, and a whole slew of tips to bulk up my plot.
It was from him that I learned of the invaluable importance of cohesive subplots.
If you are an aspiring writer, buy this book. Buy other books too, and read often, but buy this one. He's funny and engaging and informative.
Do yourself a favor and trust me on this one. If you've never written a full-length novel before, then you don't even know how little you know. You need all the help you can get.

In other news, I am not feeling well. My cat, Tink (not the gross one) seems to know I'm sick. She won't leave me alone.

How to Say 'Said'

Inspiration would be playing the part of the snitch here.

So, I made this spreadsheet of 'How to Say Said' a while back. I had writer's block somethin' fierce, and I decided to blame it on my pitiful vocabulary. I thought, "If I knew more words, then I would be able to write!"
This turned out to be quite untrue, but the spreadsheet is still pretty useful. If you have any suggestions for other ways to say said, I would be happy to add them.

Also, no, I did not just place the Harry Potter toy on top of some books for that picture. It lives there. Permanently.

On Distractions

This is my cat, Marv.

 

Marv is arguably the worst cat of all time. He yowls at all hours of the day and night, licks himself loudly and continuously, claws the furniture, and jumps up onto my lap at inopportune times. You may be chuckling to yourself, thinking that these are all distinctly cat-like traits and possibly countering that he seems like the best cat of all time. 

Lies.

Marv is the color of a moist dust bunny and has the coordination of a falling branch. He tends to throw up at the exact moment I'm heading out the door, and he has a propensity to pull out large tufts of his own fur and spit them unceremoniously onto our freshly-vacuumed blue carpet. 

Why don't I get rid of this cat? Because I love him, of course.  He was the worst present I ever got, and God love my fiance for surprising me with him. Michael truly had the best of intentions. I had been practically stamping my foot for a cat since we moved into our new house.

I think that Marv is a spectacular of example of the types of distractions writers dread. If the distraction, which I will call Marv from now on, is more than just laziness or an addiction to Facebook, I mean. 

After a while, external interruptions (Marvs) to the creative process start to drive me crazy. Just when I get a brain wave and my fingers finally begin to tap-dance over the keyboard with furious momentum, just when I hinge on crafting what is, without doubt, the greatest sentence of my literary life -- YOOooOOooOOWL! 

And it's gone, ladies and gentlemen. The taut thread snaps and that delicate whisper of the muse is struck dumb. The overwhelming feeling of loss can send me into a brief bout of bloodlust. It's not pretty.

How do you get away from Marvs?